Today God taught me an important lesson. A lesson that will stay with me in my prep for the O's. Well, I felt so lously today cos i knew i had to study but i just couldn't discipline myself to sit down and study. Stupid Mel, why try so hard in your own strength. In and of myself there is no good thing. Thank You, God, for showing me that You are the one who will give me stregth and see me through this time till the O's.

Dear God,
I don't know where to start. But as Your dear child i come to You, weak, unable to carry on on my own. I admit I need You. Forgive me for being so sturbborn, I thank You that You know what is the best way for me to study for my O's. Please teach me what it means to study for You, for Your glory and to do well for Your glory too. I do love You and want to abide in You always. Please clease me and wash me as white as snow that there may be nothing between my soul and the Saviour. By Your strength alone, I'll overcome. I thank You I have You on my side. Though impossible it may seem now, with You, all things are possible. Help me to believe just that.
In Jesus' most precious name I love and pray,
Amen. (:


hmm..its been long since i've posted. this week has been a tiring week but thank God for sustaining. Even as I'm typing this, i have many things on my mind. Like so much to do yet so little time, well, i guess i got to make the best of what i have. God has been good to me. so good to me.

Oh God, I pray you'll do a mighty work in my life. I need You. I so need You. Come.


"Stained Glass Masquerade" by Casting Crowns

Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small

Cause when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they'll soon discover
That I don't belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation's open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone who's been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who's traded
In the altar for a stage

The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart

But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay

Thanks to Malcolm for passing me the cd that i got to hear this song. The lyrics really spoke to my heart. May God help me to close the curtain on my stained glass masquerade. Thank God for a good Batam trip. What an eye opener!


"Stained Glass Masquerade" by Casting Crowns

Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small

Cause when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they'll soon discover
That I don't belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation's open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone who's been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who's traded
In the altar for a stage

The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart

But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay

Thanks to Malcolm for passing me the cd that i got to hear this song. The lyrics really spoke to my heart. May God help me to close the curtain on my stained glass masquerade. Thank God for a good Batam trip. What an eye opener!


what must i do,
to have that abundant life?
everytime i want to get close to You,
You are there.
but i slip away from You.
Lord, i'm tired.
tired of falling, failing and
sinning.
tired of living the self-life.
Father, what must i do to be free?
Could you please free your dear child?
i don't want to go on like that anymore.
i can't.
i don't want to look back and say how i wish i could be like that again.
i trust that You have better things for me then that.
the past-it's past.
i just don't know what to do. Lord show me the way.
Father, im at a cross road in life now.
and i need Your help.
I want to be right in the centre of Your will.
What You say do, i'll do.
Where You say go, i'll go.
help me to know exactly what you want me to do and where you want me to go.
i want to rest in You.
help me to do just that.
I love You. but i want to love You even more.


"REFLECTION"
Performed by Christina Aguilera

Look at me
You may think that you see who I really am
But you'll never know me
Everyday, it's as if I play a part
Now I see, if I wear a mask I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart

Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show who I am inside?

I am now in a world where
I have to hide my heart and what I believe in
But somehow I will show the world
What's inside my heart and be loved for who I am

Who is the girl I see, staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show, who I am inside?

There's a heart that must be free to fly
That burns with the need to know the reason why
Why must we all conceal what we think, how we feel?
Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide?
I won't pretend that I'm someone else for all time

When will my reflection show who I am inside?
When will my reflection show who I am inside?


*
argh. maybe im just thinking too much.


hmm..been long since i posted. (:

will just post two verses which i read during my time with God just now.

"Don't be selfish, don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. Don't think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing." Philippians 2:3,4 (NLT)

Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself; that is really something i need God to help me with. to learn to be humble, not proud.

"Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the priceless gain of knowing Christ Jesus our Lord...I no longer count on my own goodness or my ability to obey God's law, but i trust Christ to save me. For God's way of making us right with himself depends on faith." Philippians 3:8a,9b (NLT)

I'm leaving for Jakarta this Sat (18 Aug) in the morn for Asean Schools. Do keep me in prayer that i'll run to glorify God and make Him proud. Coming back on the 23 for a few hours stop over in S'pore before flying off again to Bangkok for Thai Sports school games held in Lampang. (: Lord, help. I need You.


Voice Of Truth

Oh what I would do to have
The kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is
And He's holding out His hand

But the waves are calling out my name
And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
Time and time again. "Boy, you'll never win!"
"You'll never win!"

Chorus:
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, "Do not be afraid!
"The voice of truth says, "This is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

Oh what I would do to have
The kind of strength it takes to stand before a giant
With just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound of a thousand warriors
Shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out my name
And he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
Time and time again. "Boy you'll never win!"
"You'll never win!"

But the stone was just the right size
To put the giant on the ground
And the waves they don't seem so high
From on top of them lookin' down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
When I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
Singing over me

I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

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